Everyone has questions about sex that they are too embarrassed to ask and this goes doubly so for gay sex...
Whether you are gay, bi, straight, male or female, you are probably curious about what goes on between two (or more!) guys behind closed doors.
Even if you are a sexually experienced gay man, you probably wonder what the hell other people are getting up to when you’re not around, and if you’re a young man just coming into your sexuality you probably have nothing but questions! It’s perfectly natural.
So let’s cut the B.S. and get right down to the meat of the matter. Here’s a rundown on some of the most commonly asked questions about gay sex.
Is Bottoming As Painful As It Looks?
Weellllll, yes and no.
It’s an acquired taste sort of deal. I like to think of it like drinking alcohol. The first shot you ever took in your life probably felt like hellfire screaming down your gullet. However, as you drank more frequently, your body adjusted to the unpleasant effects of alcohol and it became more enjoyable.
Anal sex is a lot like that. The first time can get pretty rough, I’m not going to lie. When you first start out, you have to take it really slow and use lots of lube. Eventually your hole will start to loosen up and the discomfort turns to bliss.
However, like alcohol, you have to keep your tolerance up. Once you get your downstairs mix-up all trained up, if you don’t keep it up through solo practice or otherwise, it will tighten back up and might not go down so smooth the next time it sees some action. Let me assure you, it’s well worth the effort!
It Must Be Nice Not To Worry About Birth Control, Right?!
Well, yeah, of course! This doesn’t mean we don’t have to worry about condoms though, people! Sexually transmitted diseases still exist, and smart gay guys know how to protect themselves with more than just condoms.
Deciding whether to ride bareback or protected is something that should be met with some serious consideration. I’m not saying you should only ever have protected sex or anything, just that if you do, you should use your brain a little bit.
For me, unless you are in a committed monogamous relationship you should probably err on the side of caution and use a condom. At the very least, make sure that your partner is a person who values being tested frequently. Risking your health for a night of good slightly better sex just doesn’t seem worth it to me.
But, like everything in life, this is ultimately a decision each person makes for themselves.
Will Asking My Playmate I They’re Tested Kill The Mood?
As much as I’d love to tell you that the answer is “No”, the fact of the matter is that some people will find it awkward and some won’t. But this doesn’t for a minute mean you still shouldn’t ask.
Sexually transmitted diseases are just a fact of life, and two people mature enough to throw down in the sack should have enough maturity to take a moment to address the issue. Don’t put yourself at risk because you’re afraid of a few seconds of social discomfort!
Since You’re Both Guys, Is Foreplay Not A Thing?
This one I get from straight dudes a lot. Personally, it makes me feel a little sorry for straight women. But that’s just me.
The truth of the matter is that there is no real answer to this question that is definitive. For me, sometimes I like to just get straight down to business. Just rip off the clothes and go to town like the bombs are dropping.
Usually, though, I like a bit of slap and tickle before the main event. Like a lot of things sexual, this falls into the “Depends on the mood and circumstances” category.
Is It Important To Use A Lot Of Lube?
This is another one that depends a lot on the circumstances. If your hole is a little under utilized, or you are fairly new to bottoming, you are probably going to want to use a metric shit-ton of lube. Seriously, go nuts- you won’t regret it.
As time goes by and you become more accustomed to bottoming, you won’t need to use so much lube if you don’t want to.
Outside of that, it becomes a matter of preference. Do you like a little more friction, or do you prefer to be slicker than a greased up televangelist? Me, I like it wet and sloppy. Your mileage may vary.
Which Position Feels Best For Anal?
Again, we are talking about something that is extremely subjective. When I first started out bottoming, I really could only handle riding on top. It gave me the control I needed to ease into things.
Over the years I have come to prefer the intimacy of missionary. I like to look into my partners eyes and see their face.
I’ll tell you what though, there really is nothing quite like being bent over and just completely ruined from behind. Again, it just comes down to mood and personal preference.
You Guys Must Give The Best Head. Any Tips?!
This is a super popular question from straight women. I guess the assumption is that since we all have the same gear we know how to use it better. Which is true to a certain extent, but it’s nothing that couldn’t be learned through experimentation.
The simple fact of the matter is that each guy has different sensitivities and zones of increased pleasure. Part of the fun of sex with a new person is discovering what turns them on.
Having said that, there are obviously some techniques that are pretty fool-proof and generally applicable to any penis, but it’s pretty basic stuff.
The head and top of the shaft, about to the middle, are extra sensitive. Work that tongue with alternating swirling and slurping motions. Be sure to switch up the pressure a bit now and then. Don’t ignore those balls!
Rimjobs! Really?
Hell yeah, rimjobs! If you can get over the initial “Yuck Factor”, a rimjob is insanely pleasurable. You really have no idea! You seriously gotta get you one of these rimjobs!
Seriously, though. Like so many other questions we’ve answered here, this really comes down to personal preference. I think a lot of guys are scared of rimjobs because they are afraid that it is super gross.
If someone’s ass is super gross, I’m not gonna want to eat it. Hell, why the hell am I thinking of fucking this person at all if they have a stanky butthole?
If you’re worried about the grossness factor, let me just assure you that anyone who is keeping up on their hygiene has a perfectly edible ass.
If it really bothers you, just make sure you and your partner take a shower before you start chowin’ down. May I refer you to question #4?
Taking a shower together is a great way to heat things up in a flash and you get the added bonus of a perfectly clean ass on the appetizer menu.
There now, that wasn’t so hard. I hope this little article answered a few of those questions you’ve been dying to have answered, but have kept to yourself! Have fun out there, and play safe!
