There are tons of things in life that don’t last a long time, like my houseplants or my willpower to resist cheesecake. But sex does not have to be one of those. Okay, I’ll concede that quickies are pretty great, and there’s a time and a place to bust your nut quickly, i.e the bathroom stall at your friend’s birthday party. For the most part though, sex should be enjoyed for as long as possible, or at least as long as you and your man want it to. I’m not saying to set a kitchen timer for your next fuck, I’m just saying more sex is better sex, right?
I’d say that good sex, like getting really into would be at least 5-15 minutes. With most vaginal intercourse lasting less than that, sorry ladies, it’s easy to see why there’s such a market for products that prolong intercourse. From gels and sprays to so much more.
If you’re looking to up the ante and last longer in the bedroom, I’ve got a few tricks to add a few more minutes to your horizontal tango. And no, I’m not going to tell you to picture your teacher or roadkill, or any other weird shit.
1. Sex isn’t just penetrative
Sex means different things to every other twink out there, so it’s important to keep this in mind. Sex doesn’t even have to involve anal penetration whatsoever. You can make foreplay last as long as your jaw muscles can, from rimming to sucking his cock and repeating that process. Kissing, erotic massages, even a little biting can be a great warm-up or it can be the whole affair, turning each other on more and more until you burst. Not only will you make your orgasm super intense, you won’t be bothered by the fact that maybe he only lasts a few minutes inside you.
PS. Sex doesn’t just have to end because you came, you probably know how sensitive your cock is after cumming. So why not tease each other a little and maybe bring out load number 2.
2. Stay less turned on
Lasting longer during sex by keeping your arousal level low. You likely struggle with lasting long during intercourse simply because you’re so turned on. If you can keep yourself less turned on you’ll be more likely to prevent premature ejaculation. Learn to keep hard without giving in to all the stimulation, you could practice edging, simply stroke your glands for high stimulation then switch to just your shaft, or completely pause. More on that later though.
3. Try out a cock ring
Now, there’s no one size fits all or the perfect cock ring for everyone. But a cock ring helps a lot of men last longer in the bedroom, just find the right one for you. I prefer a soft, stretchy silicone ring that goes around my whole package, behind my balls, and around my cock. I find these give me the best pump, but you might want to start off with a ring that goes just around the shaft if you’re new to these bad boys.
Not only will you likely last a little longer, your cock will be harder thanks to the trapped blood flow. You’ll get to enjoy your cock rock-hard and fuller. Not to mention the added veinyness is hot as hell, which is a nice plus.
4. Try mindfulness meditation
This has a bunch of benefits for gay sex. Practicing mindfulness regularly, like a daily routine, will help you observe your pleasure and arousal objectively. Bringing the breathing practices into the bedroom also helps a ton if you’re bottoming. Relaxing your hole is a lot easier if you’ve got good breathing technique. It’ll help you feel less hypersensitive and mind give you the split second you need to calm down before climaxing.
5. Take the focus off your cock and pleasure your man
If I feel like I’m about to blow my load, I’ll stop pumping my cock in and out of him and focus on his body. Think nipple play, kissing, biting, pinching, even just pulling him into me, getting more intimate, helps extend the sesh. Focusing on his pleasure will increase the arousal in both of you, bonus! So, if you get super close to cumming, take the focus off of yourself and try to bring him closer to his orgasm. It makes you a better top, and if you’re bottoming you’ll get to enjoy heightened arousal just as much as topping.
It’s a no brainer, plus you should be trying to get each other off and this will help get you off in better synchronization.
6. Practice makes perfect
But actually, if premature ejaculation isn’t a medical issue for either of you, then you could likely last longer if you just... had more sex. Think of it as endurance training in the gym, You likely didn’t start out running 5k, you probably started with like 5-10 minutes of running, followed by several minutes of profanity and pouring sweat - I’m not alone, right?
Regardless, practicing will help up your game and has the added bonus of improving your endurance. It might sound a little clinical, but I promise you’ll thank me in the long run. Improving your sexual endurance will help you last longer
7. Bring on the toys
I’m sure you’ve thought of having more than two cocks in the bedroom before, but adding a third into an exclusive relationship can add a lot of unnecessary drama. Avoid the headache and buy a couple of good-quality dildos. Once you get close to cumming, tag out with the dildo or vibrator and keep pounding away.
Once he’s close too, tag back in and get your rocks off together. It’s pretty obvious how easily this can add time to your lovemaking.
8. Get into foreplay
Like really, really into it. Not into rimming? Weird, but I can work with that. If blow jobs are more your speed swap giving each other head. Try out erotic massages, break out the baby oil and help him relax with the ultimate happy ending. Prolonging foreplay might speed up the intercourse part, but overall it makes for longer, better sex.
9. Blow a load first
Seriously, masturbate before you fuck. Men take a lot longer to cum if they’ve simply gotten their rocks off an hour or two earlier. Building arousal is pretty easy, with the right foreplay and enough time your third leg will be stiff and ready for penetration without the added pressure of a built-up load. I’m not saying miss out on the sweet load, but if you’re looking for a rousing round of penetration later that night, why not start the evening off early with some mutual masturbation.
10. Round 2
Men can get it up pretty quickly after their first load. Take advantage of this if you or your man is like that. Start things up again after a few minutes or keep them going with foreplay. Honestly, my round two’s usually come from making out after the deed and he’s just craving more cock. Your cock is likely a lot less sensitive after the first load, so you can take advantage of the delayed climax. It’s not the solution for every night, but a second load never hurts a hungry bottom.
11. This may sound obvious, but try something new
If you’ve been with the same man for a long time, things can be so routine that your body anticipates what’s coming before you do. New positions and sensations can do wonders for making you and him last longer. If he’s used to doggy style, or maybe he’s just pretty vanilla, try warming up to the idea of new positions, you could even try a sex calendar that outlines different positions for every day.
12. Give edging a try
Build up to climax, but stop before you come. You can be well before, or you can try and push it closer and closer, hence the term edging! It’s a fantastic way to build anticipation, and, quite frankly, a big load. Pausing or stopping before going back to pound town already adds time, but helps you build the endurance you’re looking for. And, like I said, it builds up a bigger load for when you’re ready to give him his reward.
13. Tightly squeeze the base of his cock
Think of it like kinking a garden hose, you’d fold it over in that case, but here, you’re keeping certain things from flowing out his cock. You can do this by hand or with a cock ring around his cock and balls. Seriously though, don’t bend his cock in half, not only is that ineffective but, just, ow. Build up your erection with a couple of Kegels, it’s like pumping blood into your cock, and it gets trapped thanks to the tight grip.
14. Obvious number 14 is Kegels
Kegels strengthen the muscles of your pelvic floor, think of when you have to stop peeing for whatever reason, you can practically shut things off down there. The pelvic floor muscles help with this. Try yoga or pilates, but Kegels are the best solution. Before I get asked, yes, men can do Kegels, and to a great benefit. It can help you shoot your load farther and even prolong ejaculation.
15. Before penetration, try rubbing
Not really making the intercourse last longer, but really your overall sex session will be prolonged. Grind your cock against his hole or try facing each other and making out. If you’re facing each other you’re both benefiting from the stimulation of rubbing your cocks together. Soon, you’ll be messy with precum, but it’s hot as fuck, my friend. Give it a shot, whether it’s against his cock or hole, it’s sure to drive him just as wild as it does to you.
16. Of course, medication.
I’m not a doctor, so don’t take my advice here. See a professional if you’ve got persistent problems with erections or premature ejaculation in the bedroom. There are a ton of prescribable, and over-the-counter, medications out there that you may want to consider for you and your partner’s needs. As a rule, don’t buy supplements or over-the-counter drugs with big claims, talk to the guys and gals who know this stuff, see a urologist and find out what’s really going on.
All of these tips should definitely give you some way to last longer in the bedroom. Talk openly with your man about your needs and maybe try a few of these together later tonight!
